The Power of Retreat

Each year I go on retreat.

Twice, actually.

I started this habit quite by mistake. At least, I wasn’t intentional about the decision initially.

The year was 2015. I was listening to Spotify constantly during work hours, mostly to kirtan. Kirtan made me feel good. It had a great rhythm so I could dance at my standing desk, but most importantly, I couldn’t understand the words because it was all in a mysterious language. In a way, this was the essence of retreat — getting away from the familiar, to get closer to myself. Of course, at the time I thought I was just getting closer to the clarity of my mind as I read and analyzed client documents, emails, strategies, and videos. I was simultaneous integrating nuanced details with big picture goals. I loved it. I had created a magical oasis of, well, of bliss. Nerdy with rhythm. (Hey, it’s my bliss. No judging.)

I was dismayed, to say the least, when my kirtan was “rudely” interrupted one day by a dharma talk. Krishna Das, the grandfather of American kirtan (by analagy think BB King to Blues, or George Clinton to Funk) was talking about something. I don’t remember what, but it touched my heart. At the end, there was a plug for a Maui Retreat. Registration opened that day. I don’t know why, exactly, but I opened the site and registered.

That was it.

Easy.

Done.

Truth be told, I had hear of this retreat in years prior. I’d even tried to register once before, but I couldn’t pull together the money to make it happen.

But this time, it was as if the stars aligned.

Months passed, and I hadn’t much thought of the retreat. I’d been to Maui before, and I’d even travelled there with my child the year prior. I don’t recall much of the travel or the arrival, other than my intense self-judgement and very LOUD self talk.

“What am I doing here?” “I am NOT a groupie” “I am NOT drinking the Cool-Aid.” “This is a waste of time.” “Blah Blah Blah”

By the end of the first night, I had a headache. My social anxiety had kicked in, and I felt like a fish out of water surrounded by hundreds of people who all loved Ram Dass. I mean LOVED him. It was palpable.

At night during this retreat, we got a mini-private concert with Krishna Das — the same guy from Spotify. This was a relief. I could retreat back into my dance/happy place. I could close my eyes and remember.

And BOY OH BOY, DID I REMEMBER!

After I exhausted my resistance, and I opened to the teachings, the environment, and the knowledge that my inner knowing was going to guide me through this unfamiliar terrain, I released. I relaxed. I let my hair down. I danced. I walked around in the sunshine with my baby on my hip and nothing but a bikini covering me. I smiled. I laughed. I transformed.

By the time I left, I was utterly the same on the outside, and completely different on the inside. I can never return to the person who arrived in Maui, but I am forever grateful for her ushering me to that gathering, even though she had no idea what lied ahead.

I knew I had to return. The feelings of love, camaraderie, and bliss were so clear, I just knew I wanted to go deeper into this space. I registered for the next retreat as soon as registration opened. That time, I returned with intention. I knew what I was getting into. I felt safe in the space and with the people — mostly I felt safe within myself. When I returned a mere 6 months later, I had a very intentional question to pose to myself — What Do I Do With Blissness?

By the end of that second retreat, once again, everything had changed. My intentional journey yielded crystal clarity and a burning passion that has fueled years to come, even what I am about to announce right now.

From the deep gratitude and endless faith I’ve cultivated from my bi-annual retreats with Ram Dass, I am ready to offer THE POWER OF INTENTION RETREAT ON MAUI. The retreat will be three days long — from Friday April 26 through Sunday April 27th.

If this calls to you, if you feel an impulse to reach out, please pick a time to get more information.

Space is limited to 6 participants.

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Why I Became a Lawyer